As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and a member of the community I live in I am asked a lot of questions. People around here aren't usually angry, just curious. I remember one day I was driving home from school with my friend. She often had questions about the church and was always welcoming to the answers. We had somehow managed to get on the subject of God's eternal plan. She just couldn't understand why in the world God would send us to Earth just to learn. I couldn't really explain it to her because I, myself, could not answer the question of why we had to go through this hell just to live with Heavenly Father again...I received my answer today.
Right now I'm going through an awful time in my life. I have cried every day this week and I don't see the water works easing up any time soon. I am lucky enough to have a Mother (in-law) that has great insight on me and what I am. She really seems to know me inside and out. Today we were chatting online. I cried the whole entire chat as she slowly discovered small truths about me that are essential for me to figure out how to deal with the crap I'm dealing with. (I really want to use a different word than crap because I feel crap doesn't give it enough umph. Just to let you know) As we neared the end of our conversation I was looking down at my light at the end of the tunnel. I sometimes like to imagine I'm there so the pain stops for like 2 seconds. I saw myself in this happy situation and was suddenly filled so strongly with the spirit. I finally understood why Heavenly Father wants us to learn here on Earth. Once this is all over I will appreciate what I have so much more. Not only that, I will understand myself and my...for lack of a better word with out giving too much away...problems...so much better. I would never be able to understand it all unless I go through this.
Do I wish that I didn't have to go through this... of course. It is LITERALLY the hardest thing on this Earth I have ever done and really ever see myself going through. But, it's important for us to pass through sorrow. (sound familiar?)
So next time you hit your next trial just remember the importance of it. It doesn't make the trial easier to trudge through but it brings purpose to trying to overcome it all.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
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